Friday, January 6, 2012

MOM AND DAD THE POINTSETTIAS AND THE CEMETERY

This Christmas holiday was a challenging one and I was not sure how it was going to unfold?  I'd like to share some feelings and a story about My Mom, the Pointsettias and the cemetery.  I've been working on this post since Christmas Day and I'm finally done, so here goes.

Since my Mom has passed and it was Christmas, I wanted to put something on my Mom and Dad's grave at the cemetery.  I thought after talking it over with Paul, that we would put pretty Pointsettias.  So Friday afternoon, I picked up two flower plants.  One was white for my Dad and one was pink for my Mom.  They were pretty.  When I returned home, I placed them on the coffee table and went about my business.  My in-laws arrived about 15 minuted later and I didn't think of them again until Paul came home from work.

Most holidays I have spent Christmas Eve with my Mom and my husband Paul. and Christmas Day with the rest of my family. We used to go up to Lake Placid to see my in-laws, however, Paul has not been able to get enough days off in a row to take the long trip there.  Well anyhow, this Christmas was however, a sure change from the ordinary ones we have had, not only because my Mom had passed away but my in-laws spent the holiday at Paul's anut and uncle's home and so did Paul and I.   My Mom and Dad in-laws came down on Friday, stayed the night and we all traveled to South Jersey to Paul's Aunt and Uncles home.

Well, before we left our house we packed all of our clothes and gifts in the cars. We had a lot of gifts that were little and they captured our attention getting them in the car.  I took a look around two times to make sure we did not forget anything and everything was clear.  We jumped in the car and off we went to South Jersey.

We arrived in South Jersey and  had a great time and enjoyed the hospitality of Paul's aunt and uncle.  There home was so warm and inviting.  Two of Paul's brothers and they're families were there as well.
There were a lot of Paul's relatives there and the house was full of joy and cheer.  Somewhere during the day, I realized, "Oh, my.  I forgot the Pointsettias!"  How could I have forgotten them?  Well, all was not lost.  There was a Walmart close by and I thought that we would stop by there and pick up two more plants.  No problem.  So, after we left the gathering, we stopped at Walmart. Thank goodness for Walmart!   I ran in and picked out two of the prettiest Pointsettia plants in red.  After, we drove to the hotel we were staying at and brought our bags to the lobby.  The parking was a far walk from the entrance so Paul suggested we leave the Poinsettias in the car!  He said,"They are winter plants.  They will be fine"  I didn't know either way, so we left them in the back seat.  It was awfully cold Christmas Eve.

On Christmas Day, we hopped back in the car and we drove back to Paul's aunt and uncle's for dinner and dessert and then we were going to make our way North to my family.  We were going to stop at the cemetery before we got to Heather (cousin)and Ron's home.  Well, we went in for dinner and left the Pointsettias in the car, again.  It is not like me to forget something as important as this.  When we came back out to take a trip about 1 mile to Paul's other uncle's home to visit another aunt and uncle, we had Paul's brother and girlfriend hold the flowers on their laps.  Unfortunately, they started looking a little wilted and I thought the cold weather was causing them to die.  When we arrived back at Paul's aunt and uncle's, we placed the Poinsettias on the seat of the car thinking that they would be okay since it was not very cold.  After we had dinner and dessert, we got back in the car and headed for Heather's.  It took us about 1 hour to drive to Toms River and to get to the cemetery.

Well, needless to say, it was dark, very dark. We pulled up to the cemetery and the gates were open so we drove in.  We were the only ones in the entire cemetery.  I began looking for my Dad's grave and I could not find it in the dark.  So, I walked around looking for a familiar landmark.  It was too dark for me to see.  I had no idea where I was walking.  I must mention, that in any other time, I am petrified of cemeteries and the whole concept of graves, death and dying!  But here we were, in the pitch black looking for a grave stone.  I thought to myself, "we have got to be nuts!" But,  I knew that I had to find the grave. As I was walking in between the stones,  I came upon a stone that looked like my Dad's, so I put the Pointsettias down in front of the stone, crossed my heart and I began to walk away until something didn't feel quite right.  I looked again, closely and I realized that I had the wrong grave.  I picked up the wilted Poinsettias and walked further down and until I began to recognize the stones.  Meanwhile, Paul went to get the car, to help shine some light on the stones.  Do you believe it?  Here I was being afraid of the cemetery in the day time and I was walking a long to find my Mom and Dad's grave in the pitch dark?  I know this sounds odd but I was determined to find my Mom and Dad's grave and place the wilted Pointsettias on the grass for them.  And this was not the first time I had been there in the dark.  (it is a story for another time).

Well, anyhow, Paul drove up to me and turned the car sideways and he put the high beam lights on the stones.  Here we were in the dark cemetery, with bright lights shining on the stones looking for my Mom and Dad's grave. It was as weird as it sounds.  Eventually, I found my Dad's stone and I felt relieved that I could place the flowers for Mom and Dad on their grave.  I crossed my heart again and I was so happy to have found the stone of my Dad and Mom even though the Pointsettias were so wilted and lacked any life to them.  I thought to myself, "Merry Christmas Mom and Dad" and I apologized for the sorry looking flowers.  I also began to realize that even if the flowers did not wilt in the car, they would have soon after we placed them on the grass.  I guess they are not a "winter plant!"

 You might ask, " what is the lesson that I learned from this story?"  It is this.  I should never go to the cemetery in the dark, ever again, especially on Christmas Day!  At the end of the day, I don't know if this is a funny story or a sad one?  I'll let you be the judge.                                                                                    

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